When it comes to youngsters, we accept apologies for bad behavior. We’ll forgive them for tipping over a lamp while they’re wrestling. We talk to them about the bad behavior and use the incident as a life lesson. How about later on, though?
Do we accept apologies when our spouse does something stupid? Okay, maybe its just the husband that does something wrong, but we usually accept the apology…maybe.
However, can we forgive the pervert who runs around groping women? Can we accept an apology from someone who harasses or yells at woman or creates workplace tension?
Do we accept that apology? Do we just blindly believe that he will reflect on his bad behavior, retreat into some type of rehab, or do penance for what he’s done?
Every religion in the world has some sort of belief in forgiveness. We’ve been brought up hearing that it is a blessing to forgive, but when it comes to these people, I’m caught in a word I love to use – a conundrum.
There is no expert on this matter. Rehabs are now teaming with celebrity patients who wish to be treated for “Sexual Harassment Syndrome”, which basically means they harass women when it suits them or the opportunity presents itself. Would anyone else like to sit in on these therapy sessions?
For these people, what is the rehab protocol? Harvey Weinstein, with 84 complaints lodged against him, spend about ten minutes in a spa and then left. Was he cured? Meanwhile the other celebrities are sitting around, enjoying hot cocoa while a therapist scolds them for their “naughty” behavior.
We all saw the speeches from the Golden Globes where celebrities pledged their solidarity to each other, but what about my clients? What about the older women with no celebrity status? Who stands up for them?
I believe in what Oprah had to say and her sincerity when speaking, but I don’t believe the news media claiming they’re in support. For how long? Until the interest cycle is over? When public interest has waned?
Should those who have suffered forgive their assailants? Let me ask some other questions before I answer my own: should Nazis be forgiven? Do we forgive the atrocities of Isis? Is Boco Haram on our forgiveness list? The answer is a resounding no.
The answer is never again. We need to be prepared to defend ourselves verbally or physically. Then and only then will #metoo be eradicated.
Take my advice for what it is…it’s just AS I SEE IT!